Friday, February 3, 2012

Finding Love After Loss: How To Fascinate Your Dates

Do you want your dates to find you utterly fascinating?

Recently, Forbes Magazine offered 10 ways NOT to be boring. My commentary about the items in this list are in italics.

1. Go exploring.
Be curious and explore the world on many levels: intellectually, physically, emotionally, and spirituality. Be open to visiting new places; listening to new ideas and considering other’s opinions.

2. Share what you discover.
When you’re out exploring and you discover something fascinating, it’s no fun if you only keep it to yourself. Share memorable tidbits with your dates. This will make you memorable, too. as the person who shared it with them.

3. Do something, anything.
Loosen the boundaries that you’ve self-imposed, maybe because you are afraid of taking action. So do something (or anything), even if it is a baby step. Remaining frozen in your beliefs and circumstances presents a closed mind (and closed door) to prospective dates.

4. Embrace your inner weirdness.
Don't worry, no one is "normal.” Your uniqueness, or way of looking at the world through different eyes, is what makes you more interesting.

5. Have a cause.
Believe in something and be passionate about it. This passion will naturally spill over into other areas of your life. Passion, or having that light in your eyes, will attract people to you.

6. Minimize the swagger.
Keep your ego in check; no one is "better" than the next guy or gal. When you think you are (and let others know about it), it's very offputting to prospective dates. Of course, you need to keep good self-esteem in balance with humility. A healthy ego is what lets you accomplish great things.

7. Give it a shot.
Be adventurous and try new things. Step out of your box. Who knows? You might like it there!

8. Hop off the bandwagon.
Learn to walk to your own drumbeat. This also relates to point #4 above. Continue to do what is right for you, even if it is not the popular stance.

9. Grow a pair.
Balance your development of an accommodating nature against being wishy-washy or indecisive. It’s good to have an opinion, as long as you don't stuff it down your date’s throat! You can agree to disagree.

10. Ignore the scolds.
Others may reprimand you or tell you not to do something. This is probably their fears talking vs. giving you good advice. Let go of regrets. You don’t want to look back and say, “could have, would have or should have.” Your gut knows what is best for you, so temper the advice you receive with your innate knowing about what is feasible for you.

Now, go out and “knock the socks off” of your dates!!

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