Friday, August 5, 2011

Alone vs. Lonely

ALONE and LONELY. These words are sometimes used interchangeably, but, to me, they are miles apart in meaning. While alone means isolated or separated from others (and at times by choice), lonely is defined as a state that produces a feeling of bleakness or desolation. So, you can choose to be alone and happy vs. alone and sad.

On the other hand, Paul Tillich, a theologian and existentialist philosopher, suggests that "language has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word solitude to express the glory of being alone."

Semantics aside ...
Due to the loss of a mate, you may find yourself alone AND lonely for a period of time. However, as you heal and spend a fair amount of leisure time by yourself, you do not necessarily have to be lonely. 

"Alone time" is when you can make the greatest leaps in your personal evolution. In fact, even when you are in the midst of a relationship, I am a big believer in taking some time apart to recharge and rejuvenate. This doesn't mean that you lead separate lives or go out partying without your mate ... only that you make room for some solitary moments.

A Solitary Moment

We are two individuals 
who have decided to walk down the path of life hand in hand

One of the reasons, I believe, our bond is strong is that 
we recognize and respect each other's need for solitude

It is not an affront to either one of us if some "alone time" is needed

Life has turned out to be one big balancing act
So, it is in this "alone time" that we both can rejuvenate, 
reflect upon our lives and our relationship, and RE-balance ourselves

I want to emphasize that what is most important to me is YOU, 
our family and the precious moments we spend together

Sometimes it is easy to put that on a back shelf 
when you get caught up in the minutia of everyday life

That is why I think our solitary moments only strengthen our bond
For I take those moments to realize
how lucky I am to have you as my partner

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