Sunday, September 19, 2010

Is Having and Maintaining a Relationship Your Top Priority?

So many of us are busy with jobs, family and other social obligations. We say we want a relationship, but can’t seem to find the time to look for one and/or develop it if someone interesting is found. Before entering a relationship, one needs to examine his/her priorities and decide if there is a willingness to make time to share life with another.

In The Psychology of Romantic Love, What Love Is, Why Love Is Born, Why It Sometimes Grows, Why It Sometimes Dies, Dr. Branden states, “You need to make time for each other and for the relationship. When and if you decide that love really matters to you as much as your work, when success in your relationship with this man/woman becomes as much an imperative as success in your career, you won’t ask “How does one find the time?” You’ll know how one does it.

A bigger time threat comes from our relationships or obligations. The time that we and our partner spend in the company of friends or colleagues can be a source of pleasure, but it’s not a substitute for time spent alone together. Nothing is. Evenings spent with people who do not matter to us, or do not matter nearly as much as the one we love, cannot be reclaimed at a later date, cannot be taken back and relived. It is now or never.”

When a person says he or she wants to find a new partner, I always ask the three questions: Are you ready? Are you willing? and Are you able? The answers to these questions will be a good indication if you are just "wishing or thinking" about a new relationship or if you are "willing" to take advantage of every opportunity put in your path in order to find one.

Next Up ... Sex As An Expression of Love

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