Friday, June 15, 2012

Three First Date Mistakes

Without risk, or allowing yourself to be vulnerable, there can be no great reward. Of course, there is the proper time and place to reveal your innermost thoughts and the minutia of your life — and it is not at a first meeting! 

A common mistake made by newcomers to the dating scene is to pace a new relationship improperly. 

Perhaps due to nervousness and not wanting there to be any awkward pauses in the conversation, daters may find themselves talking too much and feeling obligated to tell their life story. Try to keep a first meeting light and not turn it into a therapy session where old romances are rehashed. Possible talking points are current events, activities that interest you and the world around you. 

Do not look for a commitment on the first date or, for that matter, the first few dates. Relationships take time to develop, and it is over this time that all things can become known. A person can only project a false image for a finite time, and true personalities eventually shine through. 

Try not to meet a person with a preconceived agenda in mind. Don’t rush it. Courtship and the slow discovery of the other person is more than half the fun. Don’t overwhelm the other person by calling repeatedly the next day or showering the other with gifts immediately.

If you go to my Author Page on Amazon, you will find a video where I discuss the preceding three items. (It's the second video)

In all, there are 4 videos posted: How To Tell When You Are Ready To Date; Reinventing Yourself; Thoughts on Suicide; and 3 Dating Mistakes.

The preceding is a short excerpt from Love After Loss: Writing The Rest of Your Story, which is now available as a Kindle book for $9.99 (in paper at $14.95). Remember, you don't need a Kindle to read it. Just download a free reading app to read on a variety of devices.

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