Whether it was death of a spouse, divorce or break-up, all of you occupy the same space now: singlehood. For some, it is a major adjustment after many happy years of marriage, and for others it may be a relief after a tumultuous relationship. In both instances, you need to heal and then regroup before venturing out into the dating arena.
As with all new undertakings, there are various ways to approach moving forward. As you probably have gleaned from my blogs, I am a fan of making a plan!
When doing so, here are some considerations for you to ponder.
1. Envision both the big and small picture. In other words, have a master plan but don't be so focused on the future that you miss what is going on directly in front of you. If you do, you might miss the building block opportunities presented to you every day.
2. Walk to your own drumbeat. This is my favorite, for, in my own seemingly conservative way, I am a rebel at heart because I always do what I believe is best ... even if it is not the 'popular' way. Just because something consistently has been done one way, it doesn't mean you are obligated to follow that path. If you are entering new territory, put you own spin on it. Do what feels right for YOU by listening to your inner compass or intuition.
3. It's good to have a plan, but all the details don't have to be worked out to perfection before you start. Accept that you will make mistakes and these mistakes will eventually make you more successful. Reject rigidity in your plan and refine/change it as you go along. As you get deeper into the dating arena, what you thought you wanted may change shape as you learn more about yourself.
4. You don't have to go it alone. Garner support from family and friends. Let them in on the secret that you are ready to welcome new love into your life.
5. If you are overwhelmed or scared, concentrate on one step at a time. Maybe you can practice making new social connections on a friendly basis before moving onto romantic ones.
6. If you are disappointed by your results and your energy for finding new love is waning, recommit yourself to your plan. Rediscover your enthusiasm, your resolve and your belief that your special someone is waiting for you!
The basic aforementioned tips can be used in both your professional and personal life. In both instances, an important thing to remember is to keep your ego in check by not being afraid to do something simply because at the outset you can't perform well. Perhaps practice won't make it perfect, but it will increase your chances of success while honing your vision of how you want to paint the landscape of your life. And practice can also be lots of fun!!