Friday, October 12, 2012

Dating Tips: Y is for You

While participating in the dating game, as well as in many other situations in life, it’s easy to have your feelings bruised. Most often, this happens when the words and actions of others are taken more personally than intended. 

Of course, in the midst of a personal interaction, it may be difficult to avoid feeling this way. 

Over the course of a dating career, you will meet lots of new people, each with their own agenda, and it is one they are probably NOT sharing with you during the first few interactions. Consequently, you have no idea what they are really thinking. 

While you may believe a date went swimmingly and the two of you are headed for a happily ever after, your date may be just looking for a good time. 

If you ass-u-me that your date is more interested than he really is and, thus, make an innocent remark about your future together, you can scare him away. Chances are he will disappear, never to be heard from again. You are left wondering what YOU did wrong. 

The truth is that you did nothing wrong because this incident wasn’t about you. It was about your date’s inability to express himself honestly and his fear of commitment.

If you encounter this scenario, or another similar one, don’t waste your energy beating yourself up or pine for this person to return. Just say NEXT! 

If you let every rejection or slight throw you off track, you will have a difficult time with the dating scene. Simply keep in mind that everything is not about you!

The preceding is an excerpt from my book, Understanding Dating and Relationships From A to Z, which is available via Amazon. Click on the title to see more about it.  Here are the other subjects covered in the book about which you can learn.

From A to Z: Ageist, Behaved Well, Cerebral, Deceptive, Egocentric, Fear, Genital Health, Hesitant, Imaginative, Juvenile, Knight in Shining Armor, Lust, Monopolizer, Noncommittal, Optimistic, Platinum Rule, Questioner, Rebound Relationship, Stymied, Tenacious, Uncompromising, Virgin (Born Again), Wary, eXcessive, You, Zero-Tolerance.

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